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July 14th, 2005
 | 02:16 am - Sillyfic: "Mind the felt", FRM, Spike/Puppet!Angel
Written for ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif?v=92.2) slashthedrabble's challenge of "That's So Wrong!"
Rated: FRM
Spike/Angel!Puppet. Guest starring Harmony.
300 words
Mind the Felt
Harmony pushed the door open and strode into Angel’s office, documents in hand. “Hey Ang—” She stopped mid-sentence, seeing only Spike sitting at the desk and looking quite…content.
“Hi Spike,” she said more formally and with a sniff. “Have you seen the boss?”
“’Course. He’s right here.” Spike pushed the chair away from the desk revealing the mass of naked pink felt in his lap busily working his cock with little felt hands and little felt teeth, nylon tuft of black hair bobbing up and down.
“Oh. My. God.” Harmony turned a shade of what would be called pale even for a vampire, her eyes flicking a rapid triangle between the pile of puppet clothes on the desk, her puppet boss giving fellatio to her ex-boyfriend, and Spike’s smug smirk.
Angel sighed and looked up. “Harmony, do you mind?” Harmony noticed the thin puppet lips were set in a decidedly stern frown. His face seemed odd without a nose but then she realized he must have taken it off to…she left that blank unfilled. Then she noticed that the Angel puppet was anatomically correct. The little strip of felt was most definitely pointing skyward…
“That’s just wrong!” she squeaked, and fled, dropping several files in her hurry to rush out.
“Wonder what’s got the bint so uptight? I don’t see anything wrong,” Spike commented.
Angel shrugged. “Guess some people just can’t stand the thought of gay sex.” Spike leaned back as the feel of soft, nappy felt stroking his cock resumed.
“Just try to warn me this time before you come? The stains are hard to get out, and dry cleaning is literally a pain…”
“I could just throw you in the wash…”
Angel glared upward. “Do you want me to stop?”
“Er…right. Mind the felt it is…”
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*covers eyes in horror*
*smirks*
EWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Stains! *bleaches brain*
Hee! | | From: | ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.2) phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 09:32 am (UTC) |
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*smirks back* Well, yeah... I'm feeling very disturbed!
*goes off to bleach brain*
*takes Sampson with her, just in case* | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 09:31 am (UTC) |
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*L* I just had to write the obligatory puppet!smut at some point. All the cool kids are ;^) This seemed like as good of a challenge as any! ROFLMAO! Nice! *Wanders off, still laughing hysterically.* | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 03:42 pm (UTC) |
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*L* Don't wander too far still laughing hysterically. People might think you've gone nuts ;^) I so needed this--it's so very wrong, and yet so very right! | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 03:42 pm (UTC) |
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Um...I'm glad I could do right by you? ;^) Ha! :D This is too good :p Bad. But also good ;)
His face seemed odd without a nose but then she realized he must have taken it off to…she left that blank unfilled.
*lol* :D *shakes head*
and dry cleaning is literally a pain…
You're brilliant :) | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 03:43 pm (UTC) |
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Thanks! I know there's a lot of hilarious puppet fic out there. I just HAD to lend my contribution! hee.
hee. hee. hee.
hee!
::giggles:: | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 03:41 pm (UTC) |
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Glad I could make you laugh! | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 03:41 pm (UTC) |
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;^) ![[User Picture]](http://l-userpic.livejournal.com/68831292/29520) | | From: | jade422 |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 01:59 pm (UTC) |
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Okay eww.. of all the things to read at work... | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 03:40 pm (UTC) |
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*LOL* Well, I DID give the pairing...and, um, welcome to the world of the obscure new fan rating system (where FRM means "Fan Rated Mature" highest rating next to FRAO, "Fan Rated Adults Only") that most communities now require thanks to the whiney MPAA *sigh*
Hopefully not too traumatic for you? | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 03:29 pm (UTC) |
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*L* Just don't choke on that snort! The vamps aren't too good at CPR having long since stopped caring about breathing and heartrate... | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 03:28 pm (UTC) |
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*grin* So, what happens if Angel!Puppet loses his soul? | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 03:56 pm (UTC) |
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Um, Spike gets felt welts on his neck from where puppet Angel tried to gum him to death? And Buffy will have to get out her plush stake in order to end the menace, leaving both her and Spike utterly heartbroken, sitting among the bits of fluff puppet!angel leaves behind when he poofs. ![[User Picture]](http://l-userpic.livejournal.com/32268645/2809576) | | From: | trepkos |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 04:16 pm (UTC) |
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Bad and wrong! | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 04:32 pm (UTC) |
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And yet your icon is laughing... ;^) Hee! Puppet sex! I love it.
I'm so twisted. | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 08:21 pm (UTC) |
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Um, yes. You are. *snerks* That's great, and oh so wrong. Bwahahaha. | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 08:18 pm (UTC) |
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*bows* This answers a lot of my questions that I had when "Smile Time" first aired. I wondered about the anatomically correct-ness, and since his nose came off, I wondered if other things came off as well.
His face seemed odd without a nose but then she realized he must have taken it off to…she left that blank unfilled.
So wrong, so very, very wrong...
... but good to see I'm not the only one who has ever contemplated puppet!Angel getting his swerve on. | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 08:17 pm (UTC) |
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*LOL* Poor puppet angel...I once read one where his little pom-pom balls and cock slipped their velcro and Spike was holding them hostage...
And then there was a GREAT MPREG where he gave birth to a beanie baby...*snicker* OMG -
...little felt hands and little felt teeth, nylon tuft of black hair bobbing up and down
Bwaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahah! | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 08:15 pm (UTC) |
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*L* Um, yeah. I really did feel about like I was writing a fairytale at that point. That's just...
I rarely read any slash and then I would choose this one to read.
Of course, you'd think I would be prepared when clicking links in your journal, right?
No, that really was hilarious. :) | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 09:40 pm (UTC) |
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*LOL* You've only yourself to blame... ROTFLMAO! Excellent, another fic for my puppet folder....there were never enough puppet fics written! | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 09:39 pm (UTC) |
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*L* You have a puppet!folder? *is morbidly curious* so how many have you collected, exactly?
*also wonders...* You wouldn't happen to have a copy of Willa's "Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Purple Puppet Penii" would you? I'd love to be able to read it again...
Well, anyway, glad I could give you fodder for the folder! ;^) ![[User Picture]](http://l-userpic.livejournal.com/29701323/7031932) | | From: | helenkacan |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 09:30 pm (UTC) |
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Yes, what would Yoda say?
I'm having trouble imagining puppet Angel's mouth and hands on Spike's cock. An awful lot of territory to cover, even with the nose off!
Arrghhh! Too much to assimilate while reading LJ during work.
Yes, I know, my own damn fault.
Giggling hysterically and signing off.
Hugs,
H.
| | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 09:41 pm (UTC) |
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| | Re: Size matters not! | (Link) |
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*claps hand to mouth* Oh dear! Don't tell me you've read...Yoda!porn. *eep!* I don't want to know!
*L* Well I didn't say he was deep throating... Mah. Ok - it's a *really* good idea I don't watch Crank Yankers, 'cause if I did, I would seriously be considering writing a crossover fic. Not to mention a Wesley/puppet!Angel fic with a Bridget Jones moment where Wes answers the phone: "Wyndam-Price, wanton sex god, with a very bad man between his thighs...Gunn. Hello. Yes, we'll, uhm..." (TMI? I dunno. My poor, once-innocent mind has become much too corrupted to be able to tell anymore...)
Thought the Wes/Xander with Spike assistance fic was a bit twisted, but this? Squicky!Delicious and it's freakin' me out... *snicker* | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 14th, 2005 10:55 pm (UTC) |
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*LOL* OMG the phone call sounds cute!
Nice to know I can be the provider of squicky!delicious ;^) | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 15th, 2005 03:07 am (UTC) |
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Er....*checks to see if anyone is looking and then hides the body* its been so long since ive read any of your stuff, now I remember exactly why I love your fics oh so much. *giggles* puppet angel smutedness is just so wrong, but your writing is fantabulous as always ;) | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | July 15th, 2005 07:02 pm (UTC) |
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*hee* Thanks! I've seen other puppet!angel fics. Thought it was high time I add one of my own... That is brilliant. Hilarious and gross at the same time. | | From: | phendog |
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| Date: | August 19th, 2005 06:39 am (UTC) |
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*hee* Thanks! I think ;^) |
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